How High's the Water Mama?

Using WiFi suddenly became a very unattractive option as a bolt of lightning hit the lawn outside the window and I scurried round pulling aerials and plugs. Poppy, (wearing pyjamas ) and I ate supper in a leisurely manner and then I walked outside to encounter a sheet of water pouring past the back door. Skirt shoved into my underwear, and feet into wellies I struggled against the flow to the patio to watch a very muddy rising tide overtake the air bricks and rise inexorably up the patio door. With a jolt realisation dawned that this was serious stuff and the situation was fast getting out of control. Poppy developed super human strength and with the help of our neighbour we built a flood barrier in an attempt to alter the course of what was now a river. Thank God for the 20 bags of unspread compost which formed a diversionary tactic and partially persuaded the water to flow mostly around the house instead of through it.
We both remembered the piglets at the same moment and since water was now pouring through the stables with a force worthy of Hercules, waded through the surging flow fighting hysteria. No piglets visible in field, yard or stable. Finally located them balancing on logs in the wood pile and heaved them onto higher ground and into their ark.
At some point, Poppy still sporting pyjamas, stepped into the leaf catcher drain which keeps rain water tank clean and vanished up to her thighs. Thankfully after in a relatively short space of time the flow slackened and as levels fell we retired to the house. I had omitted to don socks with my wellies and they were now welded to my feet. Lying on the kitchen floor trying to remove them we succumbed to incapacitating laughter.
A narrow squeak.Damage limited. Viz. Rainwater tank full of mud and grot.
Boiler house flooded and motor on boiler dead. Water in through tumble dryer vent and mud all over utility room floor.
Carpet sodden next to utility room. Stable and shavings and straw sodden and not a little smelly.
No one hurt, nothing irreparable done. Some poor souls are totally washed out.
God Bless the fire brigade who came and pumped out the rainwater tank 48 hours later, drank copious cups of tea ( well boiled water! ) and vanished from whence they had come.
Water came back for a second try five days later but we were ready. 159 sandbags filled and strategically placed around stable, boiler room and patio. For those who like esoteric info, 1 metric ton fills 39 sand bags!!
I must confess though that now the thunder of rain on the sky light makes me a little twitchy.